A friend shared this on FB this morning and I cried watching it.
You can click on the link below to read/watch 🙂
This came at a good time for me.
I started packing for Puerto Rico last night and that meant trying on my swimsuits. Some of the suits I hadn’t been in since Vegas last summer for Summit.
I will be honest that I didn’t like what I saw staring back at me in the mirror.
I saw cellulite. I saw flab. I saw stretch marks. I saw my C-section shelf. I saw saggy boobs….TMI?…well, it is what it is and I’m just being honest…lol!
And, to be even more HONEST, it seriously made me question my decision to wear a bikini in Cancun in April.
BUT, today I have a new sense of confidence in my decision. I found an old picture of myself and am moving on!
So, yes, I loved the above article and interview of Joni on the Today Show. I love the title of this post and I love what her husband told her when she said she was never gonna be the woman he married. And, where Samantha said that it probably has more to do with what’s inside than what you eat or don’t eat. YES!!!
The prettiest girls are the happiest….not the skinniest.
I’ve been that person who took things to extreme in order to lose weight. I was obsessed with exercise for a period of time when I was teaching Zumba. I’ve blogged about it before but I taught Zumba four times a week for an hour each time and then I would run and/or do another workout almost every day. I lived and died by gadgets to tell me how many calories I burned so I could burn off what I ate that I maybe shouldn’t have. My family suffered. My mind suffered. My body suffered.
And, I got down to the lowest weight I’d been in a long time.
But, like she says, no matter what size or weight you are, you will always see flaws.
I saw flaws then, and obviously, as I said above, I still do.
But, the difference for me now is that I can accept the flaws because of the journey that got me them. My cellulite? Honestly, most every woman has it to some extent. It’s how our bodies are designed. My flab? I’ve had a baby. My stretchmarks? I’ve had a baby. My C-Section shelf? I’ve had a baby. My saggy boobs? I’ve had a baby. Ok, so maybe all those things aren’t MUTUALLY EXCLUSIVE to me having had a baby but they are definitely part of it and of me and I wouldn’t trade them for anything in the world.
So, I can tell you I wasn’t any happier when I was working out like a freak and lost weight.
I didn’t magically feel like a different person.
And, guess what? It didn’t last. I gained 20 lbs. back in less than 6 months.
And, why did I gain it back? Because it was NEVER about the weight. It was about me. It was about finding what truly made me happy.
So, what I’ve learned about myself….thanks to a LOT of personal development, focusing on myself, being a coach, and several EMDR therapy sessions….is that my weight was never what made me unhappy. However, it WAS a symptom…or maybe result is a better word….of my unhappiness….because my unhappiness and my lack of self confidence made me turn to food.
And, while my goal is still to lose weight, I can totally appreciate what Joni is saying. My goal is to lose and get in a bikini…but that’s MY goal. I understand and appreciate that’s not everyone’s goal. It should never be a goal that consumes you or one in which you go to extremes. And, it’s not my goal because I think it will make me a happier or better person. It’s because I have something to prove to myself. I feel good about the amount of time I’m committing to exercise (just a half hour 5 days a week!!). I feel good about my nutrition ~ I clean eat following the 21 Day Fix guidelines and I allow myself treats because….well, because I’m human and I don’t believe in deprivation. And, I don’t binge or hide food anymore. Doing those things made me unhappy….lol.
AND, mark my words…I AM STILL GOING TO WEAR AN EFF’NG BIKINI IN CANCUN!
I’m going to be proud of my body for what it is and love myself no matter what the scale says and regardless of the cellulite, stretch marks, shelf and saggy boobs!
No, you don’t get a swimsuit pic until April! lol